Birthing Barefoot
Childbirth Education
Birth Stories

 

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Lara's Birth Stories 
Julianna's Birth

My first birth was at a hospital in Denver, CO.  The labor room was very nice including a large laboring bathtub with jets and all.  I labored in there for 15 hours.  After not dilating past 3 centimeters, I was given the option of “speeding up” my labor with pitocin, or getting an epidural to see if rest would change things.  Luckily, I had done a little research about hospital procedures.  I knew I wanted to avoid inducement, but every woman in my life encouraged an epidural the minute I told them I was pregnant.  I knew I wanted a natural birth, but it became very easy to go along with what the nurse was suggesting.  It took two epidural for it to work, but I dilated from 3 centimeters to 10 in just an hour.  I pushed for forty five minutes.  I could’t feel a thing, I just pushed and pushed with all my strength, and then suddenly, I saw my little girl’s profile.  I remember thinking, “She looks just like me!”  I reached down, and pulled out my baby! We named her Julianna, and she was so sweet and beautiful. After that, we went through the typical routine. I remember feeling very alone when my husband was away for three hours with our daughter.  Breastfeeding was very frustrating; she just never seemed to latch on.  We went home a couple days later, and I was so excited to have my new baby.  It was very painful to walk, every muscle in my body hurt.  Fortunately, Colorado sends nurses to your home to help with post-par tum care.  She helped me with breastfeeding and made sure I was healing okay.  Looking back, I feel like I still had a great experience.  Even though I ended up not having the birth I invisioned, I am still so grateful for the eperience that changed me from a woman to a mother.

                                                        Ivan's Birth
        A few months after my daughter was born, we moved back to California.  I was pregnant right away! I was also working for a growing chiropractic and wellness center.  The two doctors I worked for encouraged me to have the natural birth I wanted.  I found my self pregnant and without insurance, so I applied for Medi-Cal and was sent to an OB/GYN at Loma Linda University Medical Center which is a teaching hospital.  I was attracted to the idea of using a midwife, but I was told they were very expensive and Medi-Cal still did not cover midwifery services.  I figured, “Ok, I’ll labor at home and go to the hospital when I know the baby is close to coming.” That is just what I did.  I labored in my bathtub at home, and decided to go to the hospital when my contractions were two minutes apart.  When I arrived at the hospital I was almost six centimeters.   My husband laid down the ground rules right away.  He explained I wanted a natural birth, to move around, eat, drink, not be monitored in bed and told the doctor to only guide the baby’s head but not to touch the neck.  We quickly became the patients nobody wanted.  Then the shift change came, and fate sent me a nurse who had five babies at a birth center.  She was so encouraging, and when things got bad, she reminded me of my ability and purpose for doing it naturally.  It was soon time to push, and suddenly there was an audience of medical students.  I was in the most vulnerable position possible, and I felt they were looking at me as if I was crazy for all the noises I was making. I pushed for five minutes and our son was born.  He looked just like his sister.  I reached down, pulled him out and placed him at my breast.  He was so beautiful and I felt like I had hit the moon.  All of the pain, scary sounds, and heavy eyes watching disappeared.  My husband was there telling me how great I did, and then Ivan latched on to my breast!  At that moment, I remembered why I did this; for him to have the best start possible.  I again remember feeling so lonely when my husband went with our son to the nursery for the hearing tests and first bath.  There was no one to talk to, and I just wanted to tell someone, “I did it!” Again, we denied all the “normal” procedures. A nurse actually came to us and said, “Ok, we are rounding up the little boys.  The medical students are ready to practice the circumcisions.”  My heart sank, I felt so bad for the parents who just didn't’t understand what that meant for their new helpless baby.  I had to recover next to another lady.  She was in a lot of pain, and her blood was all over the bathroom that we shared.  I refused all medication, and vaccinations.  I just wanted to go home.  Finally, we left, and my husband and I decided, if we were going to do this again, it would be in our home. 
                                                              Vincent's Birth 

            One year later I was pregnant again!  One of the doctor’s wives had just had a home birth, although a little scary at the end, she said it was amazing and would not have done it any other way.  The midwife she used was too far away from my home.  Soon the name Karen Baker came to me through patients and many other people in the community.  I called her and set up an interview.  The minute I walked into her home, I felt comfortable. I saw a library of books, videos and information for us.  The room she used for the prenatal exams was so warm and cozy.  Karen felt like an aunt I never knew I had.  We talked for an hour and knew that this was going to be an amazing journey.  I had a Mother’s Blessing Ceremony and I felt so close to this baby, and empowered by the support from the women around me.  My last two children were two weeks early, so naturally I thought this one would be early too.  I went into  "labor" eleven days before my due date, so I called Karen to come over and started to get comfy in my birthing pool.  I called everyone in the family, and told the women from my Mother’s Blessing to light the candles I gave them, and to send me positive thoughts during the birth. Day turned to night and I started to realize that these contractions were not changing.  Then the contractions stopped! Karen decided to leave and told me to call her if anything changed.  She told me that this could go on for hours, days, even weeks. Well, labor started and stopped for three more weeks.  I was reaching forty-two weeks.  I was feeling great physically, but emotionally I felt defeated.  I felt like I was doing something wrong, or something wasn't right with the baby.  The phone calls from concerned family and friends only made it worse.  I wanted to meet my baby, and have the homebirth I was envisioning.  The day I went into labor, friends of ours were hanging out with us. Around 8 pm I was again having regular contractions.  By 10 pm they were speeding up and becoming more intense.   I wanted to be sure this was the real thing, so I lied down in bed and tried to rest. By 11:45 pm I knew this was it!  My husband called Karen and she arrived around midnight.  I was in the pool, and getting through the contractions fine.  My husband was my anchor, and I felt even more centered when Karen arrived.  Things were progressing fast, and the contractions were right on top of each other.  I found myself squatting in the water with my torso over the edge of the pool and hanging on to my husband.  I felt so many sensations that are still fresh in my mind.  I never felt scared.  I remember Karen streaming warm water down my spine and I could feel my breathing slow down.  I soon wanted to push, and I reached inside and could feel his head still in the water bag. “Just bulge your muscles”, Karen told me.  With each push I felt his head come down more.  Suddenly, I felt burning, stretching, pressure all at once, and just as soon as the pain appeared, it disappeared.  I looked down and my son was floating in the water looking up at me.  A flood of emotions came over me and the whole room went black, except for my son's face.  My husband and I held our new son Vincent.  We spent the next few hours just falling in love.  I finally understood what all of those books were talking about, as they all described the chemical reactions that flow between mother and baby. 

                                                  
Our first moments with Vincent!                                            Julianna loves her new baby brother.

 

 

 

  When Lara was born….By her mother, Susan Neese

        

                                      Lara's proud mama!                                                              Lara's proud papa!

     I was 27 years old when I found out I was pregnant with Lara, and I was so excited that I think I was “high” the whole time I was pregnant!  Her father, Ron, and I both wanted a family, and he was also very excited by the news!

     I believe I had what would be considered a normal course of events for a pregnant woman back in 1981:  I made an appointment with an OB/GYN doctor and a series of monthly appointments was scheduled for me. Ultrasounds were not routine at that time, so I didn’t get to SEE my baby or know the sex (but my “Little Voice” told me it was the daughter I was praying for).  It wasn’t long before I was having my tummy lubricated with jelly and listening to that little butterfly heartbeat – da dit da dit dat dit.  I could hardly contain my joy!  I was weighed and my belly measured at each visit, and they counseled me on diet and prenatal vitamins and exercise.  I didn’t drink anything with caffeine in it the whole pregnancy, didn’t drink any alcohol, never smoked to start with, took no medications of any kind, and cut out any junk food. Except cheeseburgers. I thought I would die sometimes unless I had a cheeseburger!

     I bought every book I could find on baby development at different stages of pregnancy, especially the ones with prenatal photographs in them. At 10 weeks, the embryo looked like this, and could do this and that.  At 3 months, at 6 months, and finally, at 9 months -- at each phase I studied the pictures and tried to imagine what my little life-form looked like inside of me. I couldn’t wait to meet her and hold her in my arms. I sang to her all the time and her daddy spoke to her through my belly every night, telling her of all the plans he had for making her life wonderful.

     Things progressed and my tummy grew from a soft little bump the size of a grapefruit in my lower abdomen, to something more like a watermelon that took up my body from my ribcage on down!  I didn’t show until about 5 months along and FINALLY! I got to wear maternity clothes and proudly show off my expanding belly. Her movements grew ever stronger, from the little butterfly kisses early on to frequent, sometimes sudden and pretty hard bunny-rabbit kicks that could take my breath away! I called her “Thumper.” Further along, I could detect her feet and sometimes would “catch” one by wedging it up against my ribcage and then I could feel her tug on her foot to pull it away from my grasp. Uh-ohhh, I thought, an independent streak!

     When I was 7 months pregnant, Ron and I went on vacation to Reno, Nevada. We hiked all over the place, and even went white-water rafting! What was I thinking??? But I was young and fit and it never occurred to me that it could be dangerous.

     Ron and I enrolled in Lamaze classes where he learned how to be a “coach” and I learned about the stages to expect during the birth, how to breathe during contractions, what pushing was going to feel like, and how to ask for an EPIDURAL. Yep. Nobody mentioned anything about natural childbirth. We were told what to pack to take to the HOSPITAL.  I packed what I wanted to wear home and a little newborn outfit and receiving blanket to bring the baby home in.

     We lived in a two-bedroom apartment at the time.  I set up a crib, a little chest of drawers and a changing table in the baby’s room. I ordered a diaper service with real cloth diapers, like my mother had used for all of her kids. I was careful buying baby clothes until I was sure it was going to be a girl, so everything was mostly unisex type outfits. I had a little white bassinette set up next to our bed so I could keep her close the first few months. My sister Sheryl had a baby shower for me and I got all kinds of clothes and toys. We were getting ready to welcome that baby home.

     I remember that by the time I was at the end of my 8th month, I was feeling like I had ALWAYS been pregnant, and would always BE pregnant. I was getting very anxious to have the baby. I was a little uncomfortable with my “bigness,” and weary of waiting. But one night while Ron was in a night class at Crafton Hills college, I was standing at the kitchen sink doing the dishes, and I felt a sudden warm feeling down the inside of my legs, and watched a puddle forming beneath my feet! My water broke!  I knew what that meant because it had happened to my mother, who had seven kids!  I was so excited!  I had to get out a phone book and look up a number for Crafton.  I found one for the security office and called and told them what was happening and that I needed them to go find Ronnie so he could come home right away!  They went to his class and announced, “Is there a Ron Neese here?  Your wife’s water just broke!”  He was out the door like a bolt of lightening.  I was shaking with excitement! She wasn’t due for about 15 more days.  I was really thrilled that she was going to come early. It was early Friday evening, October 19.

     I called the hospital and they told me to wait until my contractions were about 2 minutes apart before I came in.  I had been having Braxton-Hicks contractions for quite a while by then, where my tummy would tighten up and feel very hard, and I was having a few of them, but nothing earth-shattering.  I cleaned up the mess on the floor and was walking around with a towel tucked between my legs as I packed a bag for the hospital.  By the time Ronnie got home, I had showered and washed my hair, and was dressed and ready to go to the hospital, towel between my legs and all.

     My contractions started getting serious, so we got in the car and drove the few miles to Loma Linda University Medical Center.  Up to the maternity wing we went and were soon settled into a very cheerily decorated labor room, complete with hospital bed and monitors of every sort at the head of the bed. Every hour or so, a nurse would come in and “check” how far I had dilated. As I got to about 6 or 7 cm, a hoard of medical students dropped in, and Ron politely ushered them right back out again. I was getting weary of being “checked” and wasn’t about to let a bunch of students in there.  The nurses announced that labor was established, hooked me up to an IV, and proceeded to hook a monitor to the top of the baby’s head, and put a belt around my tummy.  It was very uncomfortable, but seeing her heartbeat on the monitor was somehow reassuring. If I had known that they were screwing a little wire into the top of her scalp, I probably would not have allowed it.

     When I reached 9 cm, it was time for the epidural. I had to bend forward around my belly, which made it hard to breathe, especially during the frequent contractions, but they got the catheter in my spine. Immediately, I felt my legs get all warm and my body relax. I thought, well, okay, this isn’t going to be so bad!  It wasn’t long before they saw her head crown, and wheeled me into the delivery room.  I had labored for 17 hrs.  Ron was at my side the entire time, rubbing my back, encouraging me through each contraction. He was a wonderful coach and I was very glad to have him there!

     Pretty soon, I was more or less sitting up with my legs up and my feet in stirrups, and they told me to PUSH! PUSH! PUSH! And I pushed with all my might, and out she came!  It was October 20, 1981 at

     Later on, back in the recovery room, I remember holding her and looking at her as she nursed for the first time, thinking what a miracle the whole experience had been.  I thought, “Okay! I can do this again!”  And I did – two more times and brought her little brothers into the world. But those are stories for another time.

 

         


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